Connecting With Your Team

Dale Carnegie Training®

Question:

I am a team leader in a large marketing firm, overseeing the work of four other employees.  My problem is that as I grow older, I feel a growing disparity between me and the other members of my team.  I feel like it has become increasingly difficult to really connect with my employees because our interests are very different, based heavily on age difference.  I am married with two children, while one of my team members is fresh out of college.  I need to find a way to maintain my authority but also find a level of understanding despite these differences, as it is important for me to remain in the same frame of mind as the rest of my team.  Please help!

Answer:

It seems that you really care about maintaining a positive work environment and wish to stay connected with your team, regardless of your differing lifestyles and interests.  This is the first step in the process of creating a positive relationship with a team: having the desire and will to do so.  Now, all that it will take is some special consideration on your part in order to find some common ground with your team and promote these connections you are trying to build.  Here are a couple of important points to remember as you begin this process:

1. Listen and communicate.  This is key to keep things running smoothly.  Keeping the lines of communication open keeps information flowing.  This develops a sense of trust and teamwork among team members.  Also, encourage others to talk about themselves.  This will give you insight into your colleagues.  Speak of their interests as well.  People will often open up quickly on this topic – and who knows, you may have more in common with them than you may have previously thought.

2. Be an active and empathetic listener to show others that you are genuinely interested.  There are two major components of listening: active and empathetic.  Encourage those around you to express their thoughts, and be an active listener.  Ask questions, listen carefully, and really attempt to understand what is being said.  In addition, being an empathetic listener means placing yourself in a team member’s shoes.  Imagine what the other person is experiencing, and how you would handle it.  Remember that these individuals are sharing parts of their lives with you, be it professional or personal information.  Being sincere in your approach gives the other person a sense of ease when communicating with you because they know you are truly attentive, despite supposed differences.

3. Show team members that they have valuable opinions.  Communication reminds the team that you are including them in projects, and that their input really does matter.  Your team members are a great source of ideas and information.  If you can give them the sense that their suggestions are having a positive impact on the team, they will feel a stronger connection to you as the team leader for taking them into account.

It all comes down to your team knowing that you are sincerely interested in them - not only their work, but also their lives. By keeping this in mind, you’ll be able to help build some bridges over those gaps and form strong bonds that will only serve to assist in the overall productivity of your team. 

-Michael Crom, Executive Vice President of Dale Carnegie Training®

If you have any business related questions or would like advice on other workplace issues, visit our web site at http://www.bc.dalecarnegie.com/ or mailto:paul.sinkevich@dalecarnegie.com